woke

well, i woke up this morning having awoken several times in the night.  i remembered so many dreams and that is not normal, for me.  it started storming and raining in the early morning.  when i finally woke up i realized i had gotten yet another night of 9 hours of sleep.  i am on a roll.  so i got up shut my window a little because rain was coming in; opened the blinds, and begged myself to ask the question, "why am i not living in washington?".  then i remembered what all i had experienced and learned in the past 12 months.  1.  i did not know what i wanted to do in washington, thus did not know how much i should be applying for jobs.  2.  never found a job in the NW.  3.  moved back to olathe and spent the year with markli during her senior year.  4.  grew friendships.  5.  i could go on and on.  i am thankful for this year but i do love WA so!

i have been looking at loved ones blogs the past couple days and it has encouraged me to revisit my blogging days.  it has been almost a year since my last post.  

we are currently watching parenthood and have the windows open and the attic fan on.  it is a total WA feel except for the thunder and burst of downpours.  

i turn 23 this week.  that is pretty crazy.  i am going to WA in 8 days.  that is very exciting.  

this week i will be applying for as many health industry jobs i am eligible for.  that is all for now.  we are planning on a bbq this evening with some of the "family" and we need to start preparing for the event.  adios.  

painting pictures of egypt

this pretty much describes my life right now.


I don’t want to leave here
I don’t want to stay
It feels like pinching to me either way
The places I long for the most
Are the places where I’ve been
They are calling after me like a long lost friend
It’s not about losing faith
It’s not about trust
It’s all about comfortable
When you move so much
The place I was wasn’t perfect
But I had found a way to live
It wasn’t milk or honey
But then neither is this


CHORUS:
I’ve been painting pictures of Egypt
Leaving out what it lacked
The future seems so hard
And I want to go back
But the places that used to fit me
Cannot hold the things I've learned
And those roads closed off to me
While my back was turned

The past is so tangible
I know it by heart
Familiar things are never easy to discard
I was dying for some freedom
But now I hesitate to go
Caught between the promise
And the things I know


BRIDGE:
If it comes too quick
I may not recognize it
Is that the reason behind all this time and sand?
If it comes too quick
I may not appreciate it
Is that the reason behind all this time and sand?


Sara Groves speaks the truth. 

quotes

My Utmost for His Highest
"The people who influence us the most are not those who detain us with their continual talk, but those who live their lives like the stars in the sky and "the lilies of the field"--simply and unaffectedly.  Those are the lives that mold and shape us.  If you want to be of use to God, maintain the proper relationship with Jesus Christ by staying focused on Him, and He will make use of you every minute you live--yet you will be unaware, on the conscious level of your life, that you are being used of Him."


Common Prayer
"Lord, give us true words to pray for one another.  Burden our hearts with shared sorrows, and delight our spirits with mutual joy.  Let genuine love provoke in us words of blessing and inform our intercessions.  Amen."  

awhile

it's been a while.  i'm in kaldi's enjoying some coffee and internet time.  shipped sherry's christmas gift today.  i'm excited for beau, suz and madeline to come and i wish i could go visit the duerre family.


i found this quote on a blog today.

❝

Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.

— C.S. Lewis

updown

these are the things i am praying about:


student teaching where? i have to get approved to do so remotely.  
school 


i'm preparing myself for this year.  but i can't become too attached to one idea, it might change.  this is hard for me.  


so hard.